Saturday, January 25, 2014

sunny jim

once i had a monkey
his name was sunny jim
and every time i think of him
my eyes grow wet and dim

i met him in the circus
in december of forty-nine
we were breaking for the winter
and our prospects were not fine

he was only a monkey
i was only a bum
we headed for the highway
and i stuck out my thumb

i wish i could remember
all the things we did and said
i only know he was my pal
and that he is now dead

Saturday, January 18, 2014


if you scratch your toes
you bloom like a rose
if you scratch your neck
people say, what the heck

if you scratch your knee
move on, there's nothing here to see
if you scratch the back of your hand
welcome to the promised land

if you scratch your ass
you are regarded as crass
if you scratch your balls
they line you up against the wall

if you scratch your female parts
you practice the dark arts
but if only scratch your side
your mom will beam with pride

if you scratch your dick
brother, you're sick
if you scratch your head
you must believe what they said

when they put wires in your brain
that they said would ease the pain
of the diseases that you catch
when you first begin to stretch

the discombobulated mess
you call your consciousness
please excuse my foolish smile
i have lost my sense of style

Friday, January 17, 2014


i'm special. are you special, too?
let's go away together, me and you
to a magic world, where hearts are true
and no one can tell us what to do

we'll never have pimples, warts or hives
we will live our own lives
it will never be too hot or cold
we'll live forever and never grow old

i will pick you a new flower every day
and you will look at me and say
i never knew it could be this way
i love you more than the sun has rays

fairies and elves will bring us food
we'll never be in a bad mood
we'll walk beside an ocean deep
and the rain will sing us softly to sleep